Well, you’re a normal kind of feminist, you look like a girl and are not yelling at everyone.
Ever since I started writing about feminism and openly talking about it offline, I realized how many prejudices and stereotypes about feminism people have.
In my country, it often gets to the point where you want to think twice before calling yourself a feminist depending on the situation you’re put in and the people you’re surrounded by, simply because it might be too dangerous.
But, whether they are agressive or emotional, there’s one thing almost all of these people have in common — they never actually know what feminism is. …
So why care about your instincts when you can get yourself a bunch of high-tech sex toys and get multiple orgasms without worrying about your boring dates?
A few years ago, I wrote an article about the first Satisfyer I got myself in the States.
Back then, I tried to compare it with the real sex and, despite all the features and perks, I realized that it still can’t replace the experience and sensations we get from connecting with other people:
“Comparing nice masturbation and sex you might ask yourself:
Happy nipples, silence mode, suction, autopilot in case your mailman walks in, special shapes and a fancy box — what could be better?
And for me, the answer would most likely remain the same — a real…
Women get enough blame and judgment from patriarchal remnants, knowing and experiencing that yourself, why would you want to add to it?
Have you ever noticed how the majority of negative comments under a woman’s picture or a video online are often written by other women? They blame each other for not looking good enough, for not having the right body, nails, or clothes.
If you start paying attention, you’d be surprised to see how much judgment and shame women receive from other women on a daily basis.
So, what pushes so many of us to act this way in the world where you’d think women suffered enough? The reason is simple, though not always intentional due to our background.
Internalized misogyny: the underlying premise
Living in…
Even though we’re making progress in terms of gender equality, there’s still a lot of prejudice out there.
Studies show that approximately 80%-90% of women reporting sexual assaults knew their assailants. However, our society has a tendency to divide rape into multiple categories wheres rape by a friend or someone you know isn’t considered as serious as if happened with a stranger in the bush.
People think that if you were raped or harassed by someone you know, you could have avoided it by being less flirty, provocative, open, or clear with your intentions.
A victim-blaming strategy like this is a good defense mechanism that helps those people believe that they are surrounded by good men and can…
But aren’t we all? At least a little bit?
A few days ago I was talking to my colleague and friend when he suddenly said, “You’re called a Homie Hopper here in America lol.”
Not knowing what it is, I immediately googled it. To my surprise, it wasn’t an insult but rather an accurate description of me:
“A girl or guy that (hooks up/has sex with) from one person to another, where the people they choose to hook up with are within the same group of friends (homies).”
I thought about it long before I heard this expression. Though most people usually have one or two circles of friends…
Even if your intentions are good
Have you ever thought about how much impact the words we’re saying to other people can affect their mood — even if our intentions were good? When we don’t realize that our “compliment” might stick with that person for the rest of the day or even a week, or bring out an insecurity they once had? Some quite common compliments really can be toxic.
1. You’re so short/tiny!
Being 5'2, I used to be extremely self-conscious about my height. But, as I grew up and started to look older, I completely forgot about it. I don’t think about my height and sometimes, I even…
Sometimes it’s hard to accept that our bodies change. Especially when you feel like you have no control over it.
Being 5'2 tall, my weight never went over 44 kg (97 lb) no matter how much I ate or moved. I had a flat stomach I didn’t have to work for, perfect legs everyone at school was jealous of, and quite small breasts. I was happy with my genetics. After all, I didn’t have to count my calories, sweat in the gym every day, or worry about gaining weight.
In a way, life is unfair.
Why does someone get to have clear skin while not even caring to wash it, while others spend a fortune on skincare but continue to…
The lessons that came to me after my belief in first love and rose-colored glasses were smashed to the dust.
I joined the dating scene at the age of 19. Before that, despite being quite curious and sexual, I never had any kind of experience in that field. So, as I started seeing someone who was almost 10 years older than me, I was fully dependent on him and his experience.
Throughout the years I’d been in a loving yet very toxic relationship I learned a lot of lessons about love I would forever apply in my dating life.
However, there were more significant lessons I learned only after fully getting over my first real relationship. The lessons that came…
But instead, they ban people like me without an explanation.
I was never a fan of Tinder. The idea of meeting with complete strangers not knowing for sure if you’d like them enough to survive a single date was never inspiring enough to keep the app for more than a few days. Old-fashioned or not, I’ve always preferred to meet people in real life. …
Does aggression really help when it becomes the only way we address these issues?
Every day I open my social media and see people being canceled and threatened for everything under the sun.
Of course, I’m not here to defend offenders. But when I see people sending death threats and insults to women for the simple crime of wearing dreadlocks or burning sage in their apartments, I start to wonder if maybe we’ve gone a bit too far?
Today, Twitter became something I avoid opening, mainly because it feels like 80% of the content I see there is centered around fights and hate speech about everything you can and can’t imagine.
I remember creating…
